The Reveal

I’ve been caught up in the sparkle this week. After so many months of toiling the soil and tending the garden, I had the pleasure of the reveal on the weekend. I published my book,Playing Along! And for a few days I feel like I have been whisked into the blossoming limelight – emails, facebook posts, tweets galore.

Affirmation and interest from others can be so seductive… pulling you towards the heat like a moth to the flame.

But the truth is, I was one of those brides at my wedding that didn’t love the attention. I felt a bit awkward.  A little bit out of my skin in a sleek silk gown with yellow freesias in my hair. And I guess I’m confronting that same feeling now.

There’s been much written on the nuances of being an introvert vs. an extrovert, but I am beginning to understand that I am both. I walk a fine line between the two – needing and wanting to be ‘seen’ and ‘heard’ and validated, and then soon after confronting spiky emotions: self doubt, anxiety, the dreaded shame.

In fact one of the main characters in my novel, George, walks that same fragile line. Maybe that is why I was able to write him with such clarity, because he reflects the parts of myself that I grapple with.

Every week in my workshop I see people who take a similar journey. Exploring the relationship between stepping ‘out’ of themselves in order to connect with something deeper… something ‘in’.

So this week I am learning to enjoy the sparkle and glide with the glimmer, but I am also learning that it can be superficial. The attention will die down. The emails will stop coming. The sales will slow, and my task will be to continue to write and rediscover the shimmer below the surface.

Resilience.

Self-acceptance.

Vulnerability.

The treasures that are less obviously opulent, and yet worth so much more.

(If you’d like to read about the birth of ‘Playing Along’ you can do so by clicking here.)

Take a moment to think about how you feel about being in the ‘limelight’. Do you crave attention or does it unsettle you? What is your definition of ‘success’? Take ten minutes and write about the line you walk between being an extrovert and being an introvert.

Do you need or want more or less of one or the other?

3 Responses to “The Reveal”

  1. sophie james
    January 10, 2013 at 12:48 pm #

    I love what you write about the reveal, how we crave it and yet shrink from it simultaneously. I’ve just had a lot of amazing help with my blog connecting me to all these social media sites I had no knowledge of before. It opens me up to more ‘contact’ but of what kind I am unsure. Your post is mindful of that line we tread, when connection simply means exposure, which is seductive but not wholly meaningful

  2. Melissa
    January 10, 2013 at 1:31 pm #

    Hooray for you! I’m so excited to read your book – just got a copy from Amazon.co.uk!! It really really makes my day when people whom I care about (even if we haven’t met in person) make a dream come alive. Yay!

    And such good thinking questions in your post. I am ambivalent about the limelight – so much so I didn’t write under my own name for about a year – but I love to see it shine on people who have worked on so many levels in so many ways behind the scenes. Well done – I’m off to read a new book!

    • Rory Green
      January 14, 2013 at 8:53 am #

      Thank you Melissa for your support and encouragement! I have so enjoyed getting to know you through your beautiful words and I always look forward to reading more!

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